"People, like diamonds, have a basic market value, but it is only after they have been polished that the world will pay their real value."
- William Thourlby
Somehow, I manage to come across the word "Gentleman".
In current era, we often hear and use that word only in the opening of a presentation.
In the past, gentleman requires several qualities.
1. A Man of a good family.
2. Nobility in rank or personal qualities.
3. A Man with an income derived from property, a legacy or some other source.
(In simple term, he is very rich and did not need to work)
They have phrase like "to spend money like a gentleman" or "to conduct a business like a gentleman"
In both western & eastern culture, they encourage man to act like a gentleman or be a gentleman. Someone may able to make you a nobleman but no one can make you a gentleman.
The etiquette of a gentleman:
1. Always be polite - don't lower yourself to the level of person that you don't like.
2. Do not curse - it only show that you have no enough vocabulary.
3. Do not speak loudly - it only show that you can't reason without "brute force".
4. Do not lose your temper - keep cool at all time, good control over your emotion.
5. Do not stare - it show nothing but aggression.
6. Do not interrupt - it is a poor sign of etiquette.
7. Do not spit - that is an act of uncivilized .
8. Respect your elder - respect other as you would like them to respect you.
9. Do not laugh at others' mistake - it is a cruel act.
10. Wait for seating before eating - everyone should start dining at the same time.
The basics of chivalry:
1. Always open doors.
2. Help with her seat.
3. Give up your seat.
4. Stand at attention.
5. Give her your arm.
6. Ask if she needs anything.
The basics of good manners:
1. Don't flaunt your riches.
2. Never let others see you looking at your watches. - interpreted as boredom.
3. Never groom yourself in public.
4. Be punctual. - the greatest sign of respect.
5. Shake hands firmly.
6. Apply constant verbal grace.
7. Tip well and discreetly - 15% or no less than $10.
8. Project high moral values.
Behaving like a gentleman brings out the lady in every woman.
1. Be a gracious guest - thank the host or the most senior management.
2. Thank others - send handwritten thank-you notes for any gifts you receive.
3. Share your umbrella.
4. Cough thoughtfully.
5. Pay the bill discreetly.
6. Maintain eye contact.
7. Make introductions.
8. Engage people.
9. Follow the host's lead.
10. Never speak with food in your mouth.
11. Don't reach across someone.
12. Retrieve dropped items - bend at the knees, not from the waist.
13. Walk on the outside of a sidewalk. - if someone is going to be splashed, it will be you, not her.
孔子: 已所不欲,误施于人.
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